Danger: Words may be larger than they appear.

How do I explain it properly? I keep trying to figure that out, Even after years, After fights over nothing and everything, After a relationship cut short, For all the right reasons in that time, After one of the rockiest friendships I've ever had, You are still electric, I can't breathe properly with you, Just like I can't breathe right around Styrofoam, Constantly trying to catch it, My breath, I don't want to be that guy, The friend who's hung up on you, So I do my best not to be, I still try to be a good friend, As hard as I can, But then you hug me, Or touch me on accident, Or I give you a backrub, Or you fall asleep on me at a bus stop, It's a constant up and down, My heart runs marathons, Up and down hill, I want it to be normal for the sake of simplicity, I want to not have to wonder why that's there, It's funny because I keep coming back to it, And you have varying levels of interest, I feel like I've worn th

My friend asked me, If you had three hearts like an octopus What would you do? I only have one heart, And most days, It feels like it has left me, To go and have a good time without me, I write postcards to the anti-life, In hopes that she will hear me, Let me know she is okay, And that I am not as alone as I feel, If I had another heart, She would be here, That phone ringing inside my chest, Would have an answer on the other side, If I had a third heart, I would be a mutant, And mutants are the future, Erin, I would be the future, If I had three hearts like an Octopus, But I don't, I don't even have the 2 I'm supposed to, It's cold and sad without her, It's less cold and sad with someone, Anyone, To hold at night, Which is why it's always harder, When I decide to go back out into the cold, Alone, Like I've always been, There are two times I am cold when I step outside, Immediately after leaving the warmth of inside, And